Recovered from Depression

Yes I do have depression on and off. Previously I was depressed over my body, I wasn't satisfy. But I recovered from that negative thoughts. I went swimming recently and took a picture of myself at the pool recently. Having depression over the past days I have lost 3 kg. Cos when I am depressed I don't eat much. I know it's just a phase and next week I will be eating alot as usual and I know I be meaty beefy again haha.

My Journey

I quitted smoking since last year September 2018. Today was the seven months of not smoking. This morning I felt depressed, I don't know why...at the same time the smoking urge came up, it was very sudden. I just felt the urge to smoke and that I know it will uplift my mood. I was discussing this during lunch time with Wilson. Anyway, I took one stick from my office desk, two sticks which I left it here since last year 2018, I kept it knowing that one day I may really need this stick. I went downstairs and borrowed a lighter from a smoker and I light that one stick for myself. The moment I breath the fume into my throat, that moment I know I disliked smoking. At the same time it really did uplifted my mood. I know myself that this will not hook me up from chain smoking again. I will not continue to smoke, but I may smoke once in a blue moon.

Recently I started to save money for my house in next two years time, when I started to save, I know I will get my house definitely. This savings will be used for the furniture and the slight renovation fee. I will be applying a single BTO two rooms flexi flat on Dec 2021. This will be my final goal of my life. As I already accomplish my first two goal in life. One is to be boyish, the second one is to be muscular, and third one is a home and a cat. I make sure I accomplish my last goal.

While typing this blog, I can smell that awful cigarettes smell on my fingers, which makes me know that definitely I won't be smoking again anytime soon.

Last month I have saved $300 and I plan to save $300 every month and for the next two years total I will save $10,200.00. I am very determined about saving this amount and I will not let anyone to obstruct me even I am dating.

Ever since I quitted smoking, my health really improved a lot, and I am not going to let this one time slip be hooked for the rest of my life, especially this will also be a obstruction towards my savings of my goal.